Karen's Story

Below follows a mother's story sent in by Karen who runs Boobiemilk. 

They're going to be running a competition for us soon - however before that, Karen wanted to share her own story of breastfeeding her first child.  I can honestly say that I never cease to be amazed by the determination of some of the women in our group.  

Karen and William

'William was born in January 2008.  He was exactly one week late.  The labour went really well for the first 21 hours while I quietly laboured at home and then travelled 45 miles to the Birth Centre to labour in their birthing pool.  When I felt ready to push I asked the midwife to break my waters and sadly they were brown.  In this birth centre that meant a trip in the wheelchair underground and up the elevator to the hospital delivery ward.  This also meant that when William finally emerged after 3 hours of pushing and an episiotomy resulting in a third degree tear, a group of staff from the NICU whisked him to the other end of the room to be deeply suctioned.  William was finally placed on my chest and the NICU nurse told me not to breastfeed him yet because he would have to go to the NICU if his breathing worsened.  When I asked his APGAR score I was told 9, pretty good score for a baby finding it had to breathe?  

William weighed in at 9lb, I know this because a volunteer stood in the corner of the delivery room until we let her weigh him.  She had been standing there for over an hour by this point while waiting for me to finish skin-to-skin. 

The brown waters and high birth weight meant that William was watched closely and had his blood sugar monitored every couple of hours for his first day of life.  Every time we mentioned going home, we were told that it was important for William to be closely monitored until discharged from hospital.   

I knew a lot about breastfeeding.  I had attended classes, I had read books, I ran a nutrition and breastfeeding program in the US.  This all flies out of the window when you hold your first baby in your arms.  “What’s the cross cradle position again?”.  

Many of the nurses tried to help with positioning.  One nurse told me “Your nipples will toughen up in time”.  A lactation consultant came to the room with her inch long fingernails to help me position William URGH.  My work colleague and lactation consultant came to the hospital to help with positioning.  We delayed his circumcision to prevent further breastfeeding problems and left the hospital after 2 long nights stay (circumcision is very common in the US, however we decided against it after reading that it is performed without anaesthetic).   

The first night in our own home things got worse.  William refused the breast altogether.  Every time he was put close to the nipple he would scream and try to get away.  After all the suctioning and constant help with breastfeeding he’d had enough.  I was so lucky to have my husband and Mum with me.  I hand expressed onto a teaspoon while my family fed the milk to my son.  I knew that at his age, small quantities of milk were enough for him.   

We made it through the first night at home and went to see our paediatrician the next day for a routine appointment.  The Doctor assured us that this was normal and breast refusal was common.  He offered us two things, a dental syringe and a can of formula.  He laughed when I took only the syringe, he knew I wouldn’t take the formula.  Plus, if I needed formula, Mead Johnson had kindly delivered two cans while we were in the hospital (which I donated to the local food bank or tipped down the sink I don’t remember which).  The syringe made things easier, and no milk was wasted in the task of hand expression.  I had a pump but hand expression was the best method for the first couple of days.   

William took many trips in those first few weeks in the snow to see my colleague the lactation consultant and to support groups at another hospital.  We tried lots of skin to skin, we tried a nipple shield, we worked tirelessly to encourage William to like to spend time at the breast and we worked on latch.  I knew that I needed to establish a good milk supply and so we got hold of a hospital grade pump and I pumped around the clock.  I made a huge mistake in my desperation to pump enough milk for the next feed and turned the suction too high.  I destroyed my nipples OUCH!  So, as William became better and better at latching I was in agony from the pump.  I used gel pads to help repair and soothe my nipples, I used antibiotics for the mastitis that I got from the nipple trauma.  I say William got better and better, but in reality he never got really good at breastfeeding, he was just lucky that I ended up with an oversupply.  I worked with four different lactation consultants before I found the right technique for us.  William would never open his mouth wide, he hated having his nose near the breast, and in the end we had to take a hands-on approach to get a good latch.  I know that many lactation consultants take a hands off approach to breastfeeding, but I really needed to be shown how to do it and I had to shape the breast for William to get a good mouthful and not have his nose touching anything. 

I probably pumped full time for William for about a month.  We then spent the next year with a great left side latch and a dodgy right sided latch.  At three months I went back to work and sadly had to start pumping all over again.  I worked four long days.  I would feed at drop off, lunchtime and pick-up, and William would have 2-3 bottles of expressed breastmilk.  My work was very breastfeeding friendly, and my staff were very encouraging and understanding.  It would have been very easy to miss pumping sessions, but I made it a priority and it worked for us.  William received expressed breastmilk until his first birthday, and I continued to nurse at lunchtime until he turned 2.  At 18 months one of his teachers asked me to leave the room and nurse him somewhere else, this was the first time I had met with negativity towards my breastfeeding a toddler (outside the family).  I had nursed him in that building 3 times a day for two years and never had a negative comment, it blew my mind.  She never asked me to move again, she would just quietly leave the room. 

William was never sick, he made it through all the bugs that came around at the nursery, he watched quietly from his cot as each and every other child and teacher went down with vomiting and diarrhea.  He never had an ear infection, had his first diaper rash at 2 (cloth nappies are the best) and the staff were very happy to inform me of his first illness at 15 months, pink eye.  I don’t think we could have travelled on a plane without him breastfeeding, it really has been a truly magnificent parenting tool.  At six months William came to a breastfeeding conference with me for work.  He was brought to me during one of the sessions and after the session was over we were asked to return after the break so that we could do a demonstration for the next session.  He spent the entire hour flirting with the audience. 

My husband, myself and William moved back to the UK in 2010.  I was 5 months pregnant and William was still nursing maybe 4-6 times a day (he weaned at night 6 months earlier).  My family were a little concerned that he was STILL breastfeeding, but it really worked for us, and nursing while pregnant had been tough in the beginning, but had become a lot less painful by the second trimester.  I knew that William would have some jealousy when the new baby arrived, and a renewed interest for breastfeeding.  When Ellie arrived (easy labour, easy breastfeeder, gorgeous little girl), I think it really helped them to bond by sharing breastfeeding together.  William had decided early on in the pregnancy that he no longer wanted the right breast, and was very quick to give it to Ellie.  I must admit it was a little weird to look down and see such a tiny head and such a big head nursing together, but adorable all at the same time.   

William will be 4 in January, and he has had his last breastfeed.  He had been asking for it less and less, and telling me more and more when Ellie needed to nurse.  One night he asked for Boobie and Daddy told him he could have Boobie 5 more times.  I did not disagree with him, it was time.  While William nursed I cried.  It’s been a long and hard journey, but there’s nothing I would change as it’s changed my life for the better and I know that we are closer because of it.  I have used my experiences and passion for breastfeeding to promote and support other women’s choices and I’m even making it my living now.  Breastfeeding has helped me understand what help other women need to succeed at it, and I have been able to make positive changes in breastfeeding rates in the US as a result of that.  I have just graduated from Breast Buddy training in the UK which I hope will allow me to help UK women to reach their breastfeeding goals too. 

William has not asked for Boobie again. '

Ellie and WIlliam

  

Boobiemilk are having a sale throughout January with 15% discount at the checkout using the code JANUARY15  ~  'Like' their facebook page here.